I remember when I was new to motherhood, how I felt isolated at home. I needed to connect with other moms and know that I was not alone in this new world I was experiencing. Motherhood brings us so many experiences and emotions. No matter how prepared you thought you were, something unexpected always surfaces.
Finding Connection
Know that you are not alone as you sit at home, cleaning, feeding, laughing, crying and throwing up your hands. We all wonder if we’re making the right choices. The answer is yes, you are making the right choices. You are doing the best you can and know how at that moment. Does that mean we may make different decisions down the road? Of course! We learn along the way, and we figure it out.
My advice to you is to find a group of moms or supportive people you can meet with regularly. Knowing that this meet up is on the horizon or that you have a group who accepts you in your pajamas and all, can help get you through some of the tougher times.
Take Care of Yourself
Does anyone ever ask you at the end of the day, “What did you do today?” As you search your brain for something meaningful to report, all you can think of is that you ran around like a chicken with your head cut off and didn’t really accomplish anything substantial, but you are exhausted.
It’s easy to let a few years slip by before you realize that you still have some baby weight to lose, and you’re still running around, exhausted. You pour a second cup of coffee because you can’t find the first one, but that one gets cold as you find yourself cleaning something up. You need some time to take care of yourself, so you can be a better mom, spouse, friend, and employee.
Where Do You Start?
How in the world can you start taking time for yourself when you don’t even have enough time to keep the house clean? First of all, give yourself a break. Your house doesn’t need to be perfect, and neither does your self-care routine. The key is just to get started. Once you automate a small self-care habit, then it will be easier to do more. Start with a two-minute habit. Try two minutes of meditation or two minutes of exercise? Maybe you have kids climbing over you while you sit quietly and try to focus on your breath? Maybe you take your kids to the park and copy them for two minutes as they crawl, jump, climb, and run around. Two minutes doesn’t sound like much, and that’s part of the genius behind it. It’s such a small habit, that you don’t really have an excuse not to do it. At the same time, if you do the same thing every day, it can shift your rhythm a little bit each day, and create a bigger shift over time.
Grow In A Group
It’s easy to tell yourself that you will start shifting your habits, but it’s easy to skip a day, or a week, if no one is keeping you accountable. Make a commitment to a friend, or find a group that meets regularly. Voice your goals, share your sticky spots, and support each other. You are not alone in your journey and your potential is still untapped.
